It was the second day of stay at All Children's Hospital in St. Petersburg, Florida. I woke to the beautiful footprint greeting hanging on some medical contraption. It was a bittersweet surprise. We would not know that our four week old had neuroblastoma until four days later and a number of blood tests, scans and even a liver biopsy. Remember my 'Renewed Motivation' post? I really wish the book I talk about in that post was around. It would have helped immensely in this experience as you can imagine the kinds of emotions a first time mother would have experienced learning what her infant son was just diagnosed with. (Thankfully he is free and clear and has been for seven years now.)
Let's fast forward to October 2013. My son, who was seven years old this month, unfortunately witnessed the domestic violence altercation his father and I was in that ultimately jump started the process of extrication from a twelve year long relationship, a nine year marriage. It was because I was a Mother, I had the courage to finally walk away. Ultimately, it's one thing to have to endure something personally, but if my child is now affected, that's where the line is drawn.
This post is not about neuroblastoma nor domestic violence. This is about Mothers. I want to honor Mothers worldwide today. Not just my own, but all moms - not just moms who have given birth, those who foster, adopt and marry into the role, single moms, married moms, divorced/widowed moms, moms with one child, moms with eighteen children. We're awesome quite frankly. My story is only one, of millions of stories that each mother has. And every story shares the same story line, courage.
I remember having courage to sit in that hospital for six days, watching nurses, poke, prod and whisk my son away for testing while not knowing what in the fuck was going on. I remember having courage the night of the domestic violence altercation, my seven year old standing up to his father, yelling at the top of his lungs "Don't hurt her!!!!!!", with sheer fright yet determined to protect his mother. I had the courage that night to say to the police officer, yes, I don't want him back in this house, knowing that the road ahead would be unpleasant and rough - for everyone. Moms are made of courage.
I've never mentioned this before, but I am also a step-mother. The Ex has a son, who was six years old when I met him. He will be twenty years old in June. Do you know that he loves and respects me more than his own biological parents? That makes me sad, but I am very happy I can be that person for him. I love him as if he were my own. I firmly believe being in this past relationship was to be a part of his life, not his father's.
Back to moms, yes, we are courageous. Today I celebrate the Mothers of the World. For having the patience, love and determination to keep their children happy and safe. To knowing what's good for them and taking action when necessary. For working hard to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table when the father has skipped out. For trying their absolute best to give the best they can to their children no matter what.
Being a mom doesn't mean making sacrifices, it means being courageous while loving and caring with every ounce of their being.
Happy Mother's Day to all the Mothers of the world. I hope you enjoy today as much as I will.
